I being like everyday walking down the road. Today I smelt something different the air, was not the same therefore I began to worry. I was walking toward the big bridge, as I walked on to it I started to hear noises as I came around, the wind was really thick and it started to rain. As it began to rain and it was creepy so then I began to run not slowly today but really fast. Something grabbed me fast. All I could do was stop right there. I began to scream really loud. I was only half way there and I was not able to sprint the other half to get out of here. When I got to the other side after I went and figured out what had got me, it was the wind monster so therefore that is why I was all scared. Don’t begin to tell me that I am a chicken because you would have done the same thing. So that night when I got home from my adventure I was telling my boyfriend and my parents and sister and 2 brothers about this and they all though that I was crazy because they really didn’t think something like this would have happened to me. Till I began to cry because I was so scared and then that was when they all began to believe me.
The story is new and interesting but in some areas, I got lost. I think you can describe more about the monster and how you got scared and use more senses than "I saw..." I have some questions as I finished reading but you stayed mostly on one topic.
ReplyDeleteGOOD JOB!
I was wondering "why do you walk down the road everyday?". You could use commas for the sentence."my boyfriend and my parents and sister and 2 brothers"
ReplyDelete